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What are some funny rules to "being my friend"?
Like a list of humorous rules and guidelines to becoming my friend, something sort of like you'd find in a note on facebook.
MUST like eating chalk
MUST like cheese
MUST like purple
MUST have internet within 4 miles of house
MUST like yahoo answers
MUST be failing math
MUST have a horse, cow or monkey
MUST like watching Oprah
MUST like watching Dr. Phil
MUST like washing dishes
MUST like talking about cows
MUST have a subscription to The National Enquierer (only reliable mag i trust girl!!)
MUST type atleast 50 words per minute (WPM)
MUST have a license to drive me to go see a circus
MUST be a good driver
MUST clip my coupons for me
MUST like Britney Spears
MUST like Beyonce
MUST be able to sing soprano
MUST be able to play guitar like a mad man
MUST be getting all A's in everything BUT MATH
MUST be able to buy tickets for every sporting event
MUST know all lyrics to all Britney, Beyonce, Adam Lambert, Kris Allen, Pink, Lil Wayne, SOAD, 3H!03, Lady Gaga, Ashlee Simpson and Alli Sims songs
MUST be allergic to ranch
MUST not be allergic to peanut butter
MUST weigh at least 115
MUST like eating
MUST like paying for my food
MUST like paying for my weekly liposuction
MUST like being my friend
MUST like my other 2 friends
MUST like carving pumpkins on Christmas Eve with a pirate hat, a turtle neck, capris, and stilettos on. (guys too!)
MUST like eating gluten free, carb free, sugar free, sodium free, drug free, alcohol free, protein free, mulch free, jello free, gluten free, metal free, hair free, animal free, vitamic C free and cholesteral free foods on Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Halloween, HallosEve, July 4th and October 1st.
MUST be obsessed with reading
MUST be a weirdo
MUST have a pair of red jeans
MUST be my size so I can steal their jeans
MUST have a facebook
MUST have purple jeans
MUST have black jeans
MUST read newspaper
MUST be able to straighten my hair
MUST be able to rent a cow on mondays, wednesdays and February 6th every 2 years
MUST be able to read everyones mind but mine
MUST be able to clip my toe nails
MUST have gone to college for band aid removal (or planning on it)
MUST be able to wax my toes
MUST be able to pluck my armpit
MUST be able to speak horse, fish, kangaroo and dog
MUST be able to pet a spider
MUST be able to love spiders
MUST be a walking dictionary
MUST have 2 friends that are mean so I can be mean back
MUST be shorter than me
MUST have longer toe nails than me
MUST be able to do my homework
MUST be able to watch my 3 sets of octuplets that I gave birth to when I was still in utero. (when i was still in the womb)
MUST be able to drive me to all my dentist appts.
MUST like the SIMS
MUST refer to me to others as 'The LIVING LEGEND or THE QUEEN'
MUST refer to me to my face as 'MRS LIVING LEGEND QUEEN OF ALL WONDERFULLNESS'
MUST be a good liar
MUST hate twilight
MUST love watching harry potter
MUST love saying 'OMGHSSSSYDYDHD'
MUST know all texting sayings like LOL BRB ROFL
MUST take weekly drug tests
MUST take weekly alcohol tests
-This is just the half of it!
Jennifer Lopez Aint it Funny Ft. Ja Rule (Remix Version)